First draft The worst day ever

W.A.L.T recall  events through the eyes of an animal.

Success Criteria

I know I will be successful when my recount has a

• Title
• Orientation:  When? Who? Where? Why?
• Sequence of events:  What happened? Describe using the senses (hear, taste, see, smell and feel).
• Personal Comment:  How did the events make you feel?

First draft

The worst day ever

It was a beautiful sunny December afternoon i was going for a walk with my mum and dad around the river in south africa. i always full safe around my dad and my mum and the sun was so brit that’s when we see the lions.

I am walking with my dad the boss of all buffalo’s along the river bank and I see my dad  stop in his tracks.I know something was wrong but i don’t know what. that’s when I see the pride of lions lying  in the sun.We slowly turned around and we started to run.

I look around and I saw the pride of lions was behind me Bam. and then I could feel a sharp pain in my leg .The pride of lions have caught me. I can smell the dirty air I could feel the hot breath on me. I was dragged into the water next minute snap a crocodile had bit me.the crocodile was all scaley I wish I could  just wake up and find it was the worst nightmare ever.I was to weak and tired to fight back. The lions and the crocodile were fighting over me,it was like tug of war over me. I could taste defeat. then I could hear my dad’s scream and the I could feel the ground shaking like thunder the rest of buffalo’s came back and scared them off.

I can not be more relieved to be back with my family.